Bras—I couldn’t live with them, but my breasts couldn’t live without them. For decades, bra shopping was a drudgery I subjected myself to as infrequently as possible. I essentially waited until the underwires poked through and stabbed me before forcing myself to buy a new bra.
The problem was no bra fit correctly. Department store bras caused spillage or gapping. Victoria’s Secrets’ contraptions doubled my breasts both in size and number regardless of whether I tried A, B, or C cups.
I turned to Google and learned how to measure my breasts myself. I decided I was a 36B after finally conceding the size I’d worn for decades—34B—was too small. I was half right. It turns out, I’m a 32C.
But knowing I’m a 32C solved only half the puzzle of how to house my breasts. I am a 32C, yes; specifically, I am a 32C Simone Perele.
Not all bras are created equally
Just as all breasts are different, even on the same body—my left breast is larger than my right—every brand of bra fits differently. That’s why it’s hard for the average and also non-average woman to buy bras in most department stores. Lingerie departments carry five, maybe six, different brands and there’s a good chance none of those brands are right for you.
Eighty percent of all women are wearing the wrong bra, according to The New York Times. Even when the size is right—which it rarely is—the brand usually is not. This is why every woman needs to be fitted for a bra by a professional bra fitter.
Meet Allison, professional bra fitter
I read about professional bra fitting during the pandemic when I spent more time than usual alone with my breasts, dwelling on the woeful state of their attire. The article I read outlined how the pandemic affected small businesses that relied on in-person service. Trust me, there are few services more personal than bra fitting.
When quarantine restrictions eased, I decided it was time to hook up my breasts properly. There are a number of shops that offer professional bra fitting in Manhattan. I chose Town Shop on the Upper West Side.
Professional bra fitter Allison ushered me into a dressing room and explained the intimacy of fitting me for intimate apparel. She would not use a tape measure; she would assess me visually and determine my size.
She told me to take off my shirt and bra and pin my hair up. She didn’t hide her disdain for the granny bra I’d worn that day. She studied my naked breasts and then disappeared.
She returned five minutes later with a mélange of bras by different designers, in a range of styles, all of which were 32C, which is how I learned my actual bra size. Then Allison explained how to properly put on a bra.
I bent forward from the waist as Allison slipped the cups under my breasts. I stood up and she hooked the bra behind me. I jiggled my bra straps to make sure my breasts sat right at the bottom of the cup. I watched Allison pull the back band down a good four inches lower than I’d ever worn it.
“Ninety-five percent of a bra’s support comes from the back band. It needs to be snug,” Allison explained. “Only five percent of the support comes from the straps. Make sure the straps don’t slip, but they also should not dig into your skin. No marks!”
When I looked in the mirror, I gasped. My flat breasts were perfectly perky—they looked more like my 16-year-old breasts than the 60-year-old version. The bra itself had no padding and was made from the thinnest of materials. I jumped up and down and both bra and breasts stayed firmly in place.
Allison showed me where the outside end of the underwire should align to indicate the proper cup size and fit. Draw a line with your finger from the tip of the underwire up to your underarm. If the bra fit is correct, that line should reach the center of your armpit.
That first bra I tried was a Simone Perele Caresse with “spacer” technology, which means the bra lifts and separates. It fit my breasts perfectly and was love at first sight.
I also tried bras by Chantelle, Empriente, Natori, and PrimaDonna. I tried demi-bras, lace bras, convertible bras, strapless bras, and convertible/strapless bras. I could see a marked difference in how the different designers fit me and it was clear I am a Simone Perele woman. I bought three—one black, one nude, and one nude strapless/convertible.
I was bra shopping with my good friend Lara who went through the same procedure with Allison. Lara’s breasts are symmetrical and naturally separated. Every brand and style she tried looked great on her. She chose four bras by three different designers. Together, Lara and I spent two hours in that dressing room with Allison.
Allison insisted we throw away the bras we wore in and wear a new bra out. The first thing I did when I returned home was tossed out the rest of my ill-fitting granny bras, which I now regret. I wish I could show you before and after photos of my beautiful breasts.
No days off
I do not go braless ever, not even to sleep. I wear double jogging bras to work out. I do not want to feel my breasts move and I’d decided long ago that wearing a bra all the time helps prevent my breasts from sagging.
But there is no way I’m going to wear my $99 bras to bed. I headed to the local department store to find less expensive bras in the correct size. Guess what? There is no such thing as a less expensive bra that fits right.
Building a firm foundation
I think my desire for the right bra is deeper than my breasts. I think it’s an outward manifestation of an internal process. I’ve spent much of the last year and a half assessing my life and facing some difficult facts. I have begun putting structures in place to create a more solid emotional and spiritual life and that has translated to a desire for a healthier physical foundation.
New bras are my first step.
I feel more confident and more attractive wearing my new bras. My breasts appear much perkier, voluptuous, youthful. My waist seems smaller. I look more womanly, but less like a granny.
I do think it’s possible to arrive at the correct bra size with a tape measure. But going through the process with Allison and Lara was so much good, girly fun.
Everyone who wears a bra deserves to have the experience I had watching my breasts transform from pancakes to cupcakes. Everyone deserves a beautiful foundation for their breasts and their lives.
